Tuesday, November 1, 2011



So a couple of days ago, I got a call from my brother that I could barely understand. Only because I was in a Chipotle Grill which was crowded, as usual. I swear, whichever location I go to is always on full. ALWAYS.

Anyhoo, the one word that I heard him say for certain was "relaxer". And of course, that one word had my curiosity. So I asked him to text his message to me.

Here's what I got:

Bro - "Ann* wants 2 know if there is a hair relaxer or detangler suitable 4 a 12 month old girl." (*name has been changed.)

*Wooh sah* Lovelies, all my brain acknowledged was the words "relaxer" and "12 month old girl".

Here was my response, mostly fueled by emotion:
Me - "Heeeelll Naw!! Tell her "Don't you dare put chemicals in that baby's hair"! Let alone anyone. Tell her 2 go 2 Tarjay and pick up some shea moisture milk or something. Wet her hair everytime they wanna manipulate (fix) it. Put some kind of butter or cream on it. A little oil on top of it. Twist, braid or leave it curly/coily fro and live & let live. I'm about 2 eat right now but I will go by Target to get definite product names. I'll also go thru my stash at home for extra hair goodies. And if need be I'll show her how to treat/do her hair. But no means should she put some chemicals on her head."

Bro - "Ok"

Bless his heart. I can only imagine how he watered down the delivery of my text. Lol. I was borderline going H.A.M.
Now after saying all that, I simmered down a little bit. Realized I might've come off a bit harsh and sent this:

Me - "And I said all that with love. Seriously."

Y'all, all I could think about was that poor baby getting her scalp & still developing hair follicles fried. That image twisted me up all sorts of ways. Now granted, my bro's lady friend obviously has no idea because no.1, she's asking. Secondly, her hair is straight and the only afro-textured hair she's had to deal with is her only (now grown) son. Furthermore, the baby is her grandchild, which is another reason I (and no one else) can really expect her to automatically know what to do.

So I made it a point to go by Target and sent Ann* pics of different products along w/quick how-to's that she may want to try. Not that a 12 month old needs much as far as products are concerned, but I was trying to save a precious head. And yes, I was still pretty emotional about it. I can laugh at myself now.

I also sent this text to Ann:
Me - "Hope all that makes sense. Also, always use a wide-tooth comb. Detangling is a must. Always begin gently detangling/combing from the ends of the hair to the roots."

Ann - "Ok"

Several hours later after I got home, and my emotional state back down to pre-deathcon 1, I sent her links to TightlyCurly.com and left the door open for Ann to contact me if she had a question or needed help.

I just hope she heard me and I saved a precious head.


  1. I hope you saved a precious head as well. Thank about the severe damage this would have caused on this precious babies head had she gone through with it. Thank goodness for a seasoned natural, Diva like you....thank goodness!!!!!:)))

    Thanks for sharing CO, take care:))

  2. Oh I forgot...these babies in these pictures...adorable!!!

  3. I applaud you for your response! It was very well educated, and if I were you, and you lived a bit closer, I would definitely "check-in". Not obviously so, but just to see how it's going. She may be embarrassed to call or to ask for help.

    Again, kudos, ma'am!

  4. @Zainab1 - Exactly. Makes me shudder to even think about what could happen.

    @Lacoya - Good point. I'm definitely checking in. Hadn't seen the little sweetie pie in months but the last time I saw her, she had as much hair as the baby in the 1st pic. For me to get that question, it must've grown in alot. I'm just thankful her grandmom asked me before doing anything.

  5. I know exactly how you feel! I remember my mom asking me if I wanted a relaxer when I was like 3 or 4 years old and my sister saying no who is 2 years old saying no she didn't want one. My mom loved my thick hair but did not know how to do it because she has a much finer hair texture. I did not know what it was but was a risk taker but too young to make that decision. Now that I am natural she has a hair love all over again and now we realized she or eye did not understand our own hair until I went natural. I am proud of you! You could have been un-bias but this is a matter of what is best for a little baby and I think you handled it wonderfully!

  6. LOL! OMG..The thought of relaxer on a kid's scalp is making me shiver. Well done!

  7. Yes. All kinds of things went thru thinking about this.


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